Nik is at work this morning and the house is quiet. Cats lay sleeping, snails silently make their way across unpturned plant pots and I sit feeling poorly and tired. Typically, the illness began on the last day of term and carried into this morning. Painkillers, coffee and some rest today will hopefully mean I have some of the holiday without being ill.

There is so much I could say about the last few weeks that would explain the silence but I am not sure that I want to. I have spent too long trying to answer unanswerable questions and given the wrong people my time and thoughts. I hope that the saga will soon come to a conclusion. I need it to. When it does, I hope I can get back some of the faith I had in people that has been lost through it. Although perhaps I should stay as guarded and untrusting as I am now.

I now have to re-focus my thoughts and energies back onto those who have not let me down, not told lies about me and not believed the rubbish that other people have put about. Make-up for neglecting them somewhat. I am lucky to have those in my life who do listen, who do ask, who do understand and who do put up with me when I am distracted by things I shouldn't be. Thankfully there are a few.