I looked at the calendar. I noticed the date. I realised that my birthday is Sunday. I was not prepared for that.

I have been working towards the 30th when it is a certain significant other person's birthday not to the 19th. Then up it crept.

I do not want to be 31.

I think that the upset I expected to arrive on reaching 30 has in fact arrived today. I think I was too busy to be upset about 30, it never really came. I expected tears and trauma but was in fact ok.

Today I am not so fine.

:(